| i am being stupid and selfish... i got the easier end of the deal. I got the new path...the better path for me...the path that looks like it holds my happiness as of now...does it? I am not 100% sure, but right now it sure looks that way...but yet I complain and I want more out of life...and I got the easier end. you my friend or friends are at a new school ; schools struggling to find your own...making new friends alone where I am in the same environment yes I am in a whole new ballgame but I did choose this path and I am enjoying it...but did you choose your path? do you even want that path? why am i complaining? why are any of us complaining these days?
whatever. who is even listening reading ? |
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| i need to clear my head, which is why i am here. i know nobody read this anymore...xanga is so old school haha everyone is so bent up about facebook or good ole myspace to be looking into the xanga subscriptions therefore they will never hack into my thoughts and if they do whatever. This is one of those mind craps; a nice big one. The kind where you are sitting on the toliet for like a half a hour reading a magazine (a clean magazine, boys.) haha I am such a visual yet vulgar person I know. But yet such a sweet person to be friend.  So it is a new school year, but I am living a whole NEW life and I am happy really happy yes there are so many changes pieces of me that I wish I could have back yet a part of me knows it is okay because I know this is all for the best for all of us. I really think God has sent me down the right path, that all my prayers, these trials; tribulations were meant to occur and that I will find my happiness...I am on cruise control right now and it just feels really good.
But though, I feel so good it's like I am still missing that thing and now that I think I know who I am, I want something else, is that wrong? maybe I shouldn't discuss that yet...but is it wrong? I am being selfish. But, I just get that broken feeling. my heart hurts and I don't wanna hurt anymore.
-me.
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